Saturday, September 8, 2007

Turn Around

Sweet Lime chopped into squares sprinkled with salt and pepper is a favorite. It was just another lazy Sunday evening when I was having this dreading the thought of going back to work on Monday. Little did I know how my life was about to change!

I wake up feeling sick. Bad throat. decided to make myself sage infusion. And thats when it starts. Vomiting. I'm taking out everything. Just when I think I couldn't handle any more it stops. Phew! So I leave for work on my bike and bang in the middle of a traffic jam I can feel the bile rising up. Luckily the signal turns green, so I go a little ahead and park on one side and puke my guts out. I make it to my office only to feel really sick. After about 3 hours I decide to go back home. So my hubby comes to get me as I'm too sick to ride my bike. We decide to have lunch and go home. Bad Idea. I cant eat anything. By now he is really worried. I just want to go home and sleep. So we put off going to the doctor till I've slept for some time. My boss and my colleagues have already started teasing me sying that I could be preg. But I didn't miss my period so I'm not overtly worried. By the time we reach home I have a temperature. So I finally get some sleep and I'm ok. Back to work the next day.

A week later the same thing happens again। This time I'm worried। So I take an afternoon off to see the doc. I'm asked to get a sonography done. And thats when I get to know Im 12 weeks pregnant. When the lab assistant tells me that Im preg, I refused to believe her, so She showed me the monitor. Up until then I had not wanted a child. Why? I wasnt mentally, physically and finaclially ready. And was prepared to terminate it. But when the Assistant showed me the monitor and I saw my baby, her legs, hands, back, head.I was in LOVE! I knew I couldn't be a murderer. It took me a good 5 min to realise that I was looking at my baby. I can still see that image. And I could'nt wipe my grin.

Today she is 11 months old and the most precious thing in the whole world. She has singlehandedly brought about a 360 degree change in me. I am no longer short tempered, don't get hyper easily, am so much more calmer and my feathers don't get ruffled easily. My mum recovered faster because of her. She is our stress buster and with a smile to light up the whole room. I could go on and on about her and it would never end :)

Its been more than a year now and so much has changed since then. I walked out of an abusive relationship, choosing to raise my daughter by my self. So now I'm a single mom, waiting for her divorce to come through; looking at the world through my daughters eye, rediscovering all that I had lost. in short learning all over again without a days regret.

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